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| 1998
Habitat Awards Speech presented by Ronald Sher |
It is a pleasure to be with you tonight and welcome to the 1998 Habitat Achievement Awards dinner. I am honored to have been one of the judges, a sponsor tonight, as well as given the opportunity to make the award presentations for crisis management.
What are the qualifications to receive a nomination for crisis management, since it is surely an honor to be nominated in this category, let alone receive a bronze, silver, gold or platinum award.
Look up in the sky! It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a superman, no it's a crisis management award winner. A strange visitor from another planet, who came to earth with powers far beyond those of mortal men. Superman is faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, change the course of mighty rivers and bend steel with his bare hands. Superman, who is disguised as a mild mannered (or not so mild mannered) crisis management award winner, is a shareholder, director, manager or employee for a great (or not so great) metropolitan cooperative, fights a never ending battle for truth, justice, and the cooperative way.
This award is the big daddy, the entire enchilada, the big cahoona, it's the gold ring on the management carousel. It signifies the coup de grace, the piece de resistance, and the tour de force. It's Sammy Sosa and Mark MacGuire all rolled up into one.
As John Houseman would say, this award is won the hard way; you've "earned it". The award is defined by its very name 'crisis.' Critical, Responsive, Intelligent, Serious, Innovative, and Successful. This is the super person award since it means you're a shareholder, director, employee or manager of a building in crisis. Your decision making powers may not be faster than a speeding bullet, but they are expeditious under the exigent and extraordinary circumstances of your crisis. You may not be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, bend steel with your bare hands or change the course of mighty rivers, but you do possess superhuman powers and vision (not necessarily x-ray) to perform, decide, endure, and make vital, critical and important decisions that do change the course and effect the future of your cooperative to save it from disaster. Being the recipient of this award means your cooperative is being honored for overcoming tremendous obstacles, surviving insurmountable odds and triumphing over adversity.
What is a real crisis? Rebuilding after a disastrous fire, flood, any of the ten plagues-acts of God-biblical proportions, surviving a sponsor default-restructuring an over leveraged mortgage during foreclosure, cleaning up after a hazardous toxic waste spill major construction accidents and learning the definition of "force majure," financial ruin by embezzlement or defalcation of reserve funds.
Ooh!Ooh! I have found the best managing agent for crisis management. It's "tooty and muldune management". They have written an ode to the top ten crisis issues, as follows:
10. There's a holdup in the lobby
9. The super has snakes as a hobby
8. There's a defect with the lights
7. The staff has broken out in fights
6. There's dog poop in the elevator
5. The laundry room is flooding later
4. There's a toxic oil spill
3. There's enough lead paint to kill
2. The emergency contractors short a crew
1. The IRS auditor is due at two
Crisis management award winners, where are you?
The moral to this crisis story is: if your cooperative wants to avoid a crisis with all the muck and mire, just be sure that your subscription to habitat is renewed and does not expire.
In conclusion, tonight's recipients have been nominated and selected for their outstanding, dedicated, and excellent work. These award winners and their accomplishments clearly demonstrate what it really takes to overcome and triumph in a crisis. Congratulations to all.
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